People I'm Vaguely Acquainted With Say the Darndest Things!

Other stuff in other stuff.

People I'm Vaguely Acquainted With Say the Darndest Things!

Postby ComplexLitigations » 09 Mar 2010, 15:38

From my Ex-Coworker Renee.

" i see u shawty lookin like u want it..tonight you're all mine i think that you'd be picture perfect w me baby girl let's ride somewhere where we can be alone if its all right i think that we, we need to hookup & do so many things together lets just act as if there is no tomorrow, only tonight girl i can hardly wait i c...an't hardly wait to grind u push it up inside u know u feel like i do0o0o"

" fuck that good for nothin ho. bitch all u good for is spreadin your legs. take that shit to the doctor so u quit infectin everyone. leave some dick for the rest of us that actually like to fuck 1 person & not have to get diseases in the process. ugh u fuckin disgust me. u fake ass 2 faced skanky little fucking good fo...r nothing typa chlyamydia fuckin ass. die. just do me a favor & get ur fucking karma already & die."

those are the 2 most recent ones, ALL of hers are like this.
Last edited by ComplexLitigations on 09 Mar 2010, 16:04, edited 1 time in total.
nasty nova wrote:I watched Dumb and Dumber three times a day for an entire summer when it was on PPV at my friend's house.
User avatar
ComplexLitigations
Bruce Dickinson
 
Posts: 843
Joined: 10 Feb 2010, 13:56

Re: Facebook Status Updates!

Postby Jew Jitsu » 09 Mar 2010, 15:43

i'd take that over the "going to the mall" "off to work!" "god help me'' ''blah blah blah'' bullshit
ctz31 - Mon Mar 10, 2014 3:19 pm: Also blood people told me no alcohol for 24 hours. I made it 1.5.
User avatar
Jew Jitsu
Never Forgotten
 
Posts: 8265
Joined: 05 Jan 2007, 15:12
Location: Sunset Blvd., North Pole

Re: Facebook Status Updates!

Postby ONTB » 09 Mar 2010, 15:47

White guy working at Wal Mart

281-300-8004! Who, Mike Jones? WHO, MIKE JONES? SWISHA HOUSE!!! FLASHBACK, LOL!


THE KING IS BACK! COMING BACK GRITTIER & HUNGARIER THEN EVER! T.I. KING OF THE SOUTH!!!


Not gonna let these ppl get 2 me, yall on the outside lookin in, im in the inside settin up shop! Yall wanna get a taste but can't hang! REAL TALK!!!


I don't watch hockey & barely understand the sport! But im gonna watch TEAM USA GO FOR THE GOLD AGAINST CANADA ON THERE STOMPING GROUNDS! USA USA USA!!!
Last edited by ONTB on 09 Mar 2010, 16:43, edited 1 time in total.
[Mon 0:15] ONTB: Why can't the whole fucking cast come up? I want to hear what Marky Marky has to say
[Mon 0:16] Clayton Bigsby: "i'd like to thank the funky bunch"
ONTB
The Bomb Dick
 
Posts: 5430
Joined: 22 Jan 2005, 17:41

Re: Facebook Status Updates!

Postby Fletch » 09 Mar 2010, 15:57

Please use this when putting in someone's retarded updates. It'll read a lot better.
nasty nova wrote:I'm a meaningless piece of shit
User avatar
Fletch
The Bomb Dick
 
Posts: 7161
Joined: 30 Mar 2006, 10:19
Location: Number 2

Re: Facebook Status Updates!

Postby Colonel Angus » 09 Mar 2010, 16:02

Irwin M. Fletcher wrote:
Please use this when putting in someone's retarded updates. It'll read a lot better.


GPIA
"Isn't it no, baas or something? That's how I read it in a boxing book. It's South African or something."
- _, on Roberto Duran.
_ - Sun Jan 31 5:06 pm:
"it was such a sexy goal, that punched me right in the balls. metaphorically"
User avatar
Colonel Angus
Pun DMC
 
Posts: 18626
Joined: 11 Aug 2005, 15:09

Re: Facebook Status Updates!

Postby the cheese » 09 Mar 2010, 16:04

Colonel Angus wrote:
Irwin M. Fletcher wrote:
Please use this when putting in someone's retarded updates. It'll read a lot better.


GPIA


Please translate the ramblings of your ghetto friends in a separate box below
Clayton Bigsby - Wed May 23, 2012 2:55 pm: i'd rather live with a guy who's kind of annoying but a nice guy than a guy who's kind of annoying and a dick
User avatar
the cheese
The Douche
 
Posts: 16636
Joined: 30 Apr 2006, 20:40
Location: 2nd Biggest Asshole

Re: Facebook Status Updates!

Postby Clayton Bigsby » 09 Mar 2010, 16:11

Here are some lovely updates from my sister-in-law (that I've complained about on here before) from a span of just over a year when she was trying to get pregnant, got pregnant, and had twins.

September 25:
is PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!! hmmm.....wonder how many many babies?


September 29:
has some sad news.....I am no longer pregnant. I am heartbroken and feel empty, but I have no choice but to carry on.


I guess this is why you don't tell people you're pregnant a week after getting artificially inseminated.

October 3:
is slowly trying to heal.


October 16:
is such a strong person and proud of herself for making it through all of the difficult things in the past 5 years.


December 13:
is feeling grumpy and miserable and wondering how life can be soooo unfair to certain people. What the hell have I ever done that was so bad? (k, had to vent!)


March 25:
is floored at certain people who do not want to be a part of [my son]'s life. So horribly sad. Good thing he has some very terrific people in his life who make up for it.


April 8:
is having such a hard time. How could my family not want to spend any time with [my son] or help me out while I'm pregnant? Seriously.........what family does that? I'll be ok though.


What family does that? I guess the kind of family that settles their disputes in public on facebook. (This was with her parents and sisters, btw, not my side)

August 11:
HOLY CRAP!! MY WATER JUST BROKE!! SO SCARED.......


You must be scared. Not so scared that you didn't log into facebook and update your status, but still pretty terrified.

August 11 (again):
Still waiting for babies.....c section sometime today. excited and scared


Is STILL waiting. getting frustrated and contractions are getting painful. its been about 14 hrs since my water broke. it is sooooo time!!


August 25:
can't believe just how difficult it is to have her babies in the NICU. Some days are good and some days are soooooo hard. I'm not even sure how I'm making it through some days. It's also very hard to deal with a lot of nurses who want to tell you what to do and how to do it. I'm getting soooo sick of this all. Hop...efully it won't be too long now.


Lousy nurses trying to keep you and the babies healthy. They gotta a lot of nerve!

October 14:
is saying good-bye to her leftover Embryos. Sad thinking about who they would've become.


Probably more kids that call you a bitch and tell you to fuck off even though they're only 3.

November 15:
I'm officially 30 today! Hears hoping that my 30's are kinder to me than my 20's were. I must say I'm pretty happy to say good-bye to my 20's. I expect great things for my 30's :)


Yes, your 20's were horrible. Must have been tough getting married to a husband that works hard to support you, having three kids, and not having worked for the last 6 years. I hope your 30's are better.
Clayton Bigsby
Head of the Snake
 
Posts: 12056
Joined: 30 Jun 2006, 14:23

Re: People I'm Vaguely Aqcuainted With Say the Darndest Things!

Postby CourtesyFlush » 09 Mar 2010, 16:12

OMG...I have been at work all day long...walking...talking to customers...went to lunch...and low and behold if the new car delivery guy comes by to drop off some new vehicles...i'm like finishing up with him and i feel as if my pants leg keeps bunching up near my ankle...[continued with comment]...i look down and my boyshort panties and stuck in my pants leg about to fall out....holy crap...if that had of happened i would have peed all over myself laughing...hehehhehe...at least i would have had a clean pair to put on...thanks dryer...i better start checking my pants legs after getting them out of the dryer


Needless to say I did NOT comment. I should've thrown a 'Like' in there, though. :lol:
Gregs Kite - Sat Nov 12, 2011 11:24 pm: I don't know, my Wolfpack can be sneaky good in these games

JichaelDick - Tue Oct 25, 2016 8:47 am: Fulsh, you truly are the best North Carolinian ever. Sorry, Andy Griffith.
User avatar
CourtesyFlush
Friend of Friends
 
Posts: 13401
Joined: 28 Oct 2007, 01:11
Location: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Re: People I'm Vaguely Aqcuainted With Say the Darndest Things!

Postby ComplexLitigations » 09 Mar 2010, 16:24

@Bigsby, Who seriously updates their status right after their water broke? This woman seems clinically insane. Please tell me she wasn't referring to "her son" as the baby that was inside of her.
nasty nova wrote:I watched Dumb and Dumber three times a day for an entire summer when it was on PPV at my friend's house.
User avatar
ComplexLitigations
Bruce Dickinson
 
Posts: 843
Joined: 10 Feb 2010, 13:56

Re: People I'm Vaguely Aqcuainted With Say the Darndest Things!

Postby ctz31 » 10 Mar 2010, 12:27

Friends wife:

Personal obstacle overcome! It's great to realize that when I got to the gym to run & found not a single treadmill open that I didn't think "Great, excuse not to run!" but I actually though "OMG! I can't get my run in!" Discovering that running may have become a part of who I am and not just something to do is just pure motivation to go further and faster, we'll see how that pans out today : )


Fat Twat.
User avatar
ctz31
Witty Rank TBD
 
Posts: 8410
Joined: 03 Feb 2005, 10:06
Location: Why did I come to Buffalo???

Re: People I'm Vaguely Aqcuainted With Say the Darndest Things!

Postby The Long Dick of the Law » 10 Mar 2010, 15:02

ctz31 wrote:Friends wife:

Personal obstacle overcome! It's great to realize that when I got to the gym to run & found not a single treadmill open that I didn't think "Great, excuse not to run!" but I actually though "OMG! I can't get my run in!" Discovering that running may have become a part of who I am and not just something to do is just pure motivation to go further and faster, we'll see how that pans out today : )


Fat Twat.

Any bets on her #1 song on her ipod when she's running? My guess:
mister bacon love watching soccer. baseball is about as exciting as scratching my balls.
MisterTambourineMan you're not scratching your balls right, then.
User avatar
The Long Dick of the Law
TRU Patriot
 
Posts: 11226
Joined: 22 Oct 2007, 13:09
Location: Virginia

Re: People I'm Vaguely Aqcuainted With Say the Darndest Things!

Postby Clayton Bigsby » 10 Mar 2010, 15:06

An actor friend of mine, today:

ok everyones been asking me so here we go. I think the Oscars are a complete and uder JOKE and this yrs was LAUGHABLE. Cameron makes a masterpiece in a world that's never been done before and gets SNUBBED??? Bullock wins over a ROOKIE actress who KILLS her performance (did I say IT WAS HER FIRST ACTING GIG??). Guess redneck accents DO make the academy happy. who knew. AND she beat out Meryl Streep. what a joke.


Are you finished yet?

I aint finished yet. cameron deserves credit. plain and simple.


Oh, okay.

and why was michael jackson on the memorandum and NOT farrah fawcet??? MJ wasn't an actor people!!! farrah was. and since when do DISNEY kids start being the center of oscars?? Efron?? miley cyrus??? omg. what a complete joke. embarrassed to say that's my industry. oh did I mention it was 5 hrs long?? superbowls aren't even that long. INCLUDING pre-game!!! there is a reason why actors boycott award ceramonies!!


Yes, I noticed a lot of actors weren't there. Except for every single person nominated.
Clayton Bigsby
Head of the Snake
 
Posts: 12056
Joined: 30 Jun 2006, 14:23

Re: People I'm Vaguely Aqcuainted With Say the Darndest Things!

Postby Colonel Angus » 10 Mar 2010, 15:08

Dude, that's his industry. His.
"Isn't it no, baas or something? That's how I read it in a boxing book. It's South African or something."
- _, on Roberto Duran.
_ - Sun Jan 31 5:06 pm:
"it was such a sexy goal, that punched me right in the balls. metaphorically"
User avatar
Colonel Angus
Pun DMC
 
Posts: 18626
Joined: 11 Aug 2005, 15:09

Re: People I'm Vaguely Aqcuainted With Say the Darndest Things!

Postby Iron Mike Sharpe » 10 Mar 2010, 15:46

This guy obviously doesn't remember MJ's tour de force perfomance in The Wiz.
User avatar
Iron Mike Sharpe
Full of good cheer
 
Posts: 17252
Joined: 11 May 2007, 13:07

Re: People I'm Vaguely Aqcuainted With Say the Darndest Things!

Postby ONTB » 10 Mar 2010, 15:51

Iron Mike Sharpe wrote:This guy obviously doesn't remember MJ's tour de force perfomance in The Wiz.


Or Moonwalker. He killed it.
[Mon 0:15] ONTB: Why can't the whole fucking cast come up? I want to hear what Marky Marky has to say
[Mon 0:16] Clayton Bigsby: "i'd like to thank the funky bunch"
ONTB
The Bomb Dick
 
Posts: 5430
Joined: 22 Jan 2005, 17:41

Next

Return to Misc.

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: mj3528 and 29 guests