You know what really grinds my gears? (RANTS)

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You know what really grinds my gears? (RANTS)

Postby Beer Goggles » 16 May 2005, 17:24

Just vent.
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Postby Beer Goggles » 16 May 2005, 17:30

FUCK those letters that say something like the following:

?There was an abundance of qualified applicants?We considered you application closely?You didn?t have the experience we were looking for?We?ll keep your resume on file??

FUCK. YOU. What about the fact that I am actually overqualified for your bullshit position? What are the odds that you posted this position as a ?p.r.? thing to cover your bases because you already knew who you were gonna hire in the first place? How about the fact that my application gets handled by some moronic H.R. person who doesn?t know how to fucking read? How am I ever supposed to get the ?necessary experience? if nobody ever gives me that first chance? Fuck all of you H.R. sons of bitches.

Next time, just send me an email that says something like the following:

?You didn?t get it. You didn?t know the right people. Don?t bother applying next time unless you know someone.?

You?ll fucking save a lot time, trees, and a whole lot of aggravation.

FUCK the job application process and all ?the games? that go along with it.


By the way, I CAN'T WAIT get a job. Then, I?m going to send them a letter. It?s going to say something like this:

This year, there was an abundance of parties intrigued by me, my background, and my skills. However, I could only proceed with a select group of interviews due to the overwhelming number of interested parties. Due to the fact that your H.R. department had their collective thumbs up their collective asses, your agency missed out on the opportunity for an interview. Nevertheless, I?ll bookmark the website of your agency, and maybe I?ll apply again someday when your agency gets a clue.

Best of luck in your endeavors of finding someone with competence.

Sincerely,

Beer Goggles

P.S. I heard WD-40 works wonders for dislodging objects jammed in tight places.
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Postby Frank the Tank » 17 May 2005, 07:06

FUCK corporate types who have to put a positive spin on goddamn everything!

"Depsite losing $99 million in the prior quarter we are well on our way to leveraging the appropriate synergies to unlock full shareholder value..." (instead: try "we lost money. we should stop doing that, huh?")

"We began to realize the benefits of the merger as EBITDA loss mitigated 8.6%..." (instead: try "we had to use this non-standard accounting measure to make it look like we lost less money than last year, but we're still pretty much fucked.")

"Our operations are now streamlined, and we find ourselved in unique position to take advantage of favorable conditions in the marketplace..." (instead: try "we fired three thousand long-term employees in order to save a few bucks and pay our CEO a gigantic bonus. His new yacht is bigger than the house you currently can't make payment on.")
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Postby Rodney Farva » 17 May 2005, 07:14

So far I luvs this thread because BG's and FTT's avatars are absolutely perfect for ranting. Avatars rock.
You coin contrarian bro and say shit nonsense like this.
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Postby Rodney Farva » 17 May 2005, 12:34

why are there award shows......for sports? the espys and the laureus awards, what the hell? who cares who some panel picks to be "best crossdressing male athlete with a limp and a dog named Petey?" do we really need to see athletes throw on tuxes/gowns so they can go on stage with some c-list celeb pushing their crappy movie and woodenly read lame jokes off a teleprompter?

this was hammered home tonight when sportscenter asia had a clip of cuba gooding jr. and martina navratilova awarding best male athlete at the laureas awards. went something like this:

cuba: and the year's best male athlete is.....
martina: <opens envelope>
cuba: <jumps excitedly to the side as if struck by a cannonball and walks a big cirle away from and back toward martina> WOO!
martina: well i played tennis with him once for an hour....
cuba: WOOO!
martina: and it felt like a year. Roger Federer.
cuba: OH, MY MAN! ROGER FEDERER! ROGER!

seriously, dude was jumping around as if his kid just won the nobel prize for his third grade science project. all for "my man" roger federer. what up with that?

and was martina's comment supposed to be a compliment? sounded a bit like a smackdown.

why? why? why?
You coin contrarian bro and say shit nonsense like this.
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Postby Tecmo Bo » 17 May 2005, 12:40

The only "award shows" sports should need are called the Super Bowl, the World Series and the NBA Finals. period, the end. You didn't win? We're not going to hand you some made up award to make you not feel like a loser. Try a little harder next time chump or sign with a team other than Kansas City.
bosux191820042090: what kills more is that now more than ever the team needs him[A-Rod] to put it on his back, and he can't...i hate to say this, but if given a choice i would rather have ortiz on my team any day
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Postby Frank the Tank » 17 May 2005, 12:46

Tecmo Bo wrote:The only "award shows" sports should need are called the Super Bowl, the World Series and the NBA Finals. period, the end. You didn't win? We're not going to hand you some made up award to make you not feel like a loser. Try a little harder next time chump or sign with a team other than Kansas City.

In Snake's absence I'll throw the Arena Bowl on that list. He'd be upset if no one mentioned it.

Fuck the Stanley Cup. I hope hockey comes back but it's a new league that starts from scratch, uses the Olympic-sized rinks, and puts a dominant team in Hartford. If they don't follow that exact formula then fuck hockey all together.
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Postby Tecmo Bo » 17 May 2005, 12:49

Frank the Tank wrote:
Tecmo Bo wrote:The only "award shows" sports should need are called the Super Bowl, the World Series and the NBA Finals. period, the end. You didn't win? We're not going to hand you some made up award to make you not feel like a loser. Try a little harder next time chump or sign with a team other than Kansas City.

In Snake's absence I'll throw the Arena Bowl on that list. He'd be upset if no one mentioned it.

Fuck the Stanley Cup. I hope hockey comes back but it's a new league that starts from scratch, uses the Olympic-sized rinks, and puts a dominant team in Hartford. If they don't follow that exact formula then fuck hockey all together.


Arena Football is like AAA or AA baseball though. They're pros, but if they were better, they'd be in the NFL. Or the CFL.
bosux191820042090: what kills more is that now more than ever the team needs him[A-Rod] to put it on his back, and he can't...i hate to say this, but if given a choice i would rather have ortiz on my team any day
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Postby thedudeabides » 17 May 2005, 19:39

Why can't people fully appreciate the value and genuis of cupcakes over cake? Too many occasions are ruined by there being cake instead of cupcakes.

Cupcakes are superior to cake because (a) They are individually and exactly portioned. (b) They are easier to store. (c) everyone can get one because you make the right amount or more than the right amount. (d) They stay moist longer.

Cake is worthless. It's messy and doesn't taste good. Cupcakes are so much more sensible and economical.

Icecream cake, however, is another thing all together.......
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Postby mister bacon » 17 May 2005, 19:44

FUCK YOU CITY OF LOS ANGELES

For towing my car even though I PAID ALL MY PARKING TICKETS WHEN I REGISTERED MY CAR!!!

Now I have to pay for my car getting impounded, even though it was not supposed to be. This is the kind of shit that deserves to be on the people's court. Fuck the government, I can't smoke a joint but you fuckers can sit on your fat asses and impound my fucking car which I already paid all my tickets on.

Somethings gotta be done, I aint putting up with this shit. One way or another, the Parking Enforcement Bureau of Los Angeles will pay.

Its fucking personal now.
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Postby howboutafrescahmmm » 17 May 2005, 19:44

thedudeabides wrote:Why can't people fully appreciate the value and genuis of cupcakes over cake? Too many occasions are ruined by there being cake instead of cupcakes.

Cupcakes are superior to cake because (a) They are individually and exactly portioned. (b) They are easier to store. (c) everyone can get one because you make the right amount or more than the right amount. (d) They stay moist longer.

Cake is worthless. It's messy and doesn't taste good. Cupcakes are so much more sensible and economical.

Icecream cake, however, is another thing all together.......


What about ice cream cake? ice cream cake rocks
"The Yankees have that guy (Tony) Womack playing left field," Henderson said. "If I can't play that position at least as well as he can, I'll hang up the spikes right now.'' ? Rickey Henderson.
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Postby sportsdorkhater » 17 May 2005, 19:46

howboutafrescahmmm wrote:
thedudeabides wrote:Why can't people fully appreciate the value and genuis of cupcakes over cake? Too many occasions are ruined by there being cake instead of cupcakes.

Cupcakes are superior to cake because (a) They are individually and exactly portioned. (b) They are easier to store. (c) everyone can get one because you make the right amount or more than the right amount. (d) They stay moist longer.

Cake is worthless. It's messy and doesn't taste good. Cupcakes are so much more sensible and economical.

Icecream cake, however, is another thing all together.......


What about ice cream cake? ice cream cake rocks


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Postby howboutafrescahmmm » 17 May 2005, 19:50

mister bacon wrote:FUCK YOU CITY OF LOS ANGELES

For towing my car even though I PAID ALL MY PARKING TICKETS WHEN I REGISTERED MY CAR!!!

Now I have to pay for my car getting impounded, even though it was not supposed to be. This is the kind of shit that deserves to be on the people's court. Fuck the government, I can't smoke a joint but you fuckers can sit on your fat asses and impound my fucking car which I already paid all my tickets on.

Somethings gotta be done, I aint putting up with this shit. One way or another, the Parking Enforcement Bureau of Los Angeles will pay.

Its fucking personal now.


If you pay for my plane ticket i'll fly out there and help you.....It'll make a great movie, think of the voice over...He is an angry black man on a mission, he is an apathetic white guy who bangs dunkin donuts chicks.. together they are Black Thunder White Lighting
"The Yankees have that guy (Tony) Womack playing left field," Henderson said. "If I can't play that position at least as well as he can, I'll hang up the spikes right now.'' ? Rickey Henderson.
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Postby thedudeabides » 17 May 2005, 19:51

howboutafrescahmmm wrote:
thedudeabides wrote:Why can't people fully appreciate the value and genuis of cupcakes over cake? Too many occasions are ruined by there being cake instead of cupcakes.

Cupcakes are superior to cake because (a) They are individually and exactly portioned. (b) They are easier to store. (c) everyone can get one because you make the right amount or more than the right amount. (d) They stay moist longer.

Cake is worthless. It's messy and doesn't taste good. Cupcakes are so much more sensible and economical.

Icecream cake, however, is another thing all together.......


What about ice cream cake? ice cream cake rocks


I believe I left icecream cake alone in the above statement. I am quite fond of icecream cake. In fact, cupcakes can't hold a candle to icecream cake(resist the urge to post anything about candels melting icecream). If their was some way to make icecream cupcakes, however, my head might explode.
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Postby Parker45 » 17 May 2005, 19:53

Oh they exist... Not sure if they are DQ ice cream cupcakes, but I have had em.

They dooooooooo exist.

Commence with the exploding of the dome.
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