Gaylord's LOST Season 4 thread

Postby Gaylord » 09 Jan 2008, 14:22

All right I was doing my research for my much anticipated Lost season preview, and I was thinking who everyone in SotSG would be, so if you?re thinking about rocking a Lost avatar for the upcoming season, here is who you are:

Jack ? Theny ? These assholes both always find a way to involve themselves in every plot, whether its Theny making every other post in every single thread or Jack bossing everyone around and giving medical advice to everyone on the island, but at least they do their part to make sure everyone survives, whether its leading the group to safety or posting 100 times a day to help everyone survive a boring workday

Jacob ? Firstborn ? too obvious, both are the creators, both rarely like to be seen so they do their bidding through peons, both like run things from behind the scenes

Shannon ? Magnum ? both the only good-looking girls, both high maintenance and kind of annoying, neither brought much to the table, but since they were chicks everyone put up with them, then one died, and one quit the board?

Ben ? Rickey Sez ? the guy who thinks he?s smarter (wittier) than the masses, on a power trip when he?s really just a lackey to the true power, nevertheless has been there from the beginning and has support from the creator, may have grown sloppy in the power struggle, coasting on past reputation and support from fellow ?jacob? lackeys

Locke ? Frank the Tank ? Both earned respect from the beginning, one with hunting skill, one with savvy wit, both have kept that respect and become leaders? even without back from the power source, eventually Jacob and FB realized their power and lobbied them to their side; they?ve both played both sides, and are major ??s in the upcoming showdown

Boone ? Wolfe ? both had their moment in the limelight as a main character, both worshipped their ?Lockes?, hell both even got lucky and fucked their ?Shannons?, tragically both were cut down in their primes? one by a fall in a plane, one by a new work policing system

Sawyer ? Gaylord ? the two ladies men, both are allegedly ?deviants?, both have shady pasts but both are spectacularly witty, and kind of assholes, but when the chips are down we?re both money

Kate ? MoreCowbell - the only significant female on the island and the only significant female ever on the site, both had lame boyfriends before joining, that ex-husband cop and that future husband Capt Canoe, both subsequently fell for the leader (Jack and Theny, respectively), both were pretty lame and never really contributed much to advancement of plot (discussion of sports), but at least they helped break up the sausagefest

Mr. Eko ? Mr. Bacon ? both huge black guys who used to be immensely popular but were forgotten by everyone after they were engulfed by black smoke and law school, respectively

Desmond ? BostonSucksMyBalls ? these two integral characters burst onto the scene with a bang, and quickly became the island and board favorites, respectively; they?re both always in the thick of the action, and always good for a laugh, whether with a well timed ?brotha? or a witty zinger flung at Bostonians, although I guess that would make PJ76 Penny, which makes sense, neither can get onto the island, although everyone sans ?Jacob? is trying to get them back

Jin ? sportsdorkhater ? both have been major characters and appreciated by all, though neither have really understood whats going on, they both just go about their own business and occasionally come up money to everyone?s surprise (sdh with his occasional witty comment, Jin with his beat downs of Others, like Patchy)

Sun - ONTB ? they have both been defined by their love of Jin (sdh) and his culture (blind Sawx and Pawtriat love) they?ve both been left to explain that love on their own with absences of their heroes and failed miserably, once reunited both have mercifully faded to the background

Hurley ? Nerf66 - this one clearly should have been JD ? the jovial fat guy that everyone likes, but sadly he?s rarely heard from these days, and Hurley is not going away, Nerf and Hurley are both always hanging out, both pretty laid back, both pretty funny

Walt ? jack_daniels ? both were young and kind of spazzes, they were both pretty funny and brought a lot to the table, both grew up before our eyes, Walt from cute little kid to creepy teenager in 30 days, _ from loveable stoner to business mogul, neither have been heard from much of late

Sayid ? Nova ? both started out as badasses, whether with torturing and killing people or laying waste to people with witty comments and putdowns, both were subsequently neutered, one by the loss of his beloved Shannon, one by his selling out to the man, they both exist as former shells of themselves, Sayid is consistently out-badassed by Jack, and Nova has been known to get pwn3d by the likes of jack_daniels

Juliet ? Stalker ? the new girl with the crush on the main character, both are kind of annoying and probably not hot, but theyre chicks so we put up with them

Charlie ? Ogie ? a loveable midget scamp with a drug problem, both these guys have had their ups and downs, and have been occasionally reduced to the butt of jokes, but both are integral to the plot or staving off work boredom, also both have done plenty of groupies (rock and Southie groupies, respectively)

Claire ? Bixby ? on again off again lovers with Charlie (Ogie), both have become main characters and are at their best when ridiculing the local midget drug addict, both also have problems with mongloid half brothers, Claire?s is trying to sleep with her, Bix?s is trying to take all his money

Tom ? BrianDean79 ? for the most part a faceless enforcer for the bad guys, always around, and sometimes stood out with a funny comment, also both have had extremely gay moments (Tom not wanting to watch Kate undress, BD79 not wanting to watch chicks make out)

Libby - Dick Hertz ? both appeared from nowhere and won over the crowd immediately, also both have an irrational crush on their Hurley (nerf)

Miguel (Patchy) ? Rodney Farva ? another lackey of Firstborns, both these clowns have been known to go off on their own and cause havoc for the islanders, whether by trying to kill them or locking and changing their posts, sometimes they can be funny whether by running through an electric fence or making a pictorial breakdown, Patchy blew himself up and retired, everyone on SotSG just wishes Farva would retire?

Rose ? SouthernYokel ? both have been known to pop up once in while, Rose with her annoying messages and trying to order Jack around and Yokel with his annoying questions about Lost, such as asking Theny to explain who Jacob is

Paolo ? bosux191820042080 ? both famous for their love of pooping

Flight 815 pilot ? BSM ? both were shaping up to be main characters then vanished and were subsequently forgotten

Naomi ? Collingsworth ? both popped in for a brief time, answered some questions then popped out

All right now everyone suit up with your respective avatars, apparently the countdown is at 3 weeks, once I figure out how to save my Cuthbert av, I'll start rocking a Sawyer... also any other comparisons are welcome, I couldn't for the life of me figure out who was the board Rousseau...
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Postby JichaelDick » 09 Jan 2008, 14:31

Gaylord, I've got one thing in common with Sawyer that you don't.

I used to live in his hometown of Jasper, AL.

ETA: Having said that, and having never watched an episode of Lost (I just remember reading that Sawyer was from Jasper), that was f'awesome.
Last edited by JichaelDick on 09 Jan 2008, 14:33, edited 1 time in total.
TVF wannabe - Mon Jan 30, 2017 1:42 pm: ...a good rule of thumb is if you post some thing like that and IMS quickly jumps in with an uncomfortable reference you went too far
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Postby Frank the Tank » 09 Jan 2008, 14:31

:lol: The Entertainment Weekly preview's got nothing on you Gaylord.
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Postby Theny » 09 Jan 2008, 14:35

Haha, nice work Gay. Who would be Rousseau here? That's a good question. Someone kinda weird and aloof.
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Postby SouthernYokel » 09 Jan 2008, 15:00

Nice job Gay. That was funny, even if you screwed me again. Rose? Fuck that, i'm a main character. I can be Claire's baby, babies are stupid like me.
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Postby Gaylord » 09 Jan 2008, 15:08

SouthernYokel wrote:Nice job Gay. That was funny, even if you screwed me again. Rose? Fuck that, i'm a main character. I can be Claire's baby, babies are stupid like me.

Haha sorry buddy, I ran out of main characters by the time I got to you, you need to post more often... we miss that 25 a day average, now go give me a play-by-play of your breakup with Tits in the Misc section, and maybe I'll upgrade you to Bernard

Also that avatar is hilarious, way to be a good sport...
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Postby Briandong79 » 09 Jan 2008, 15:27

Tom?!?!? Fucking Tom? I posted the .gif of Kate's boobs swinging in the breeze in the air duct! Totally unfair characterization.

Nice work otherwise though.
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Postby BostonSucksMyBalls » 09 Jan 2008, 17:31

haha nice job dude. Im Desmond huh? Excellent Ogie/Charlie connection
PS: I will never like July 27th. It will always be the day Reggie died. I just hate this day. True Celtic fans know what I mean.

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Postby WampaOne » 09 Jan 2008, 20:45

Fuck that crap! I sported one of the first Lost avatars here (Hurley, with numbers for sig and stuff). And I am always half a season late. I demand a recount.

Great post btw Gay. Hall of famish even.
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Postby Iron Mike Sharpe » 09 Jan 2008, 22:02

They need to forget about last season's cliffhanger for the first week and give Vincent a flashback episode for this season's premier.
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Postby firstborn » 09 Jan 2008, 23:40

After reading that post, this thread is retired and a new thread is born.
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Postby Fletch » 10 Jan 2008, 02:22

Still 12th in active posters, 20th in total posts.

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Postby nova » 10 Jan 2008, 06:45

Well done, Gaylord.
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Postby Magnum » 10 Jan 2008, 07:45

Haha, IMS is Vincent? And I didn't stop coming to the board. In fact, I am here way more than Cowbell.

At least you didn't make me Claire, with OG being Charlie and all.
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Postby BostonSucksMyBalls » 10 Jan 2008, 09:53

Irwin M. Fletcher wrote:Still 12th in active posters, 20th in total posts.


You can be Michael. You are both a little whiny. Haha. Egregious of Gaylord to leave both Michael and you out. Both important characters.
PS: I will never like July 27th. It will always be the day Reggie died. I just hate this day. True Celtic fans know what I mean.

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