Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Football

Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby MisterTambourineMan » 15 Nov 2017, 12:11

Briandong79 wrote:
MisterTambourineMan wrote:The UCF girl or the Navy girl....these are the hard questions.


I mean, I can understand not doing so, but did you look at their faces?


They had faces?


CourtesyFlush wrote:
Briandong79 wrote:
CourtesyFlush wrote:Lord's work, Goose. I'll take that Temple lady since nobody wants her.


The Tulane girls aren't too shabby either. 3 1 2.

I'd go 1,3,2 but the dropoff from the first two to 2 is WIIIIIIIIIIDE


Co-sign every word here.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby Rodney Farva » 15 Nov 2017, 19:42

from the first two to 2?
You coin contrarian bro and say shit nonsense like this.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby BostonSucksMyBalls » 15 Nov 2017, 20:21

Navy then Temple for me. I keep it real.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby Goose » 22 Nov 2017, 12:43

Last Thursday I was in beautiful Jacksonville, FL for work (x-post I Go Places). I was solo for dinner, so I worked on my 2018 projections and watched the first quarter of the USF-Tulsa tilt in my hotel room. Tulsa's starting QB was (supposedly) their only legit offensive weapon and he got knocked out in the first few minutes, so it looked like we would destroy these guys. Fast forward to their backup QB carving up Charlie Strong's vaunted defense, then running for a TD and it's 7-0 Tulsa.

If this USF football team was the POTUS, their secret service code name would be Shaky Starts. However, our offense came to life after that and scored TDs on three straight drives to finish the 1st quarter.

After the quarter ended I decided to go to dinner. I chose to eat at Miller's Ale House for a few practical reasons: the USF game was on ESPN so it was bound to be on several of their 50+ TVs, it was literally next door to the hotel which meant I would miss a minimum amount of game time and I could drink more beer without fear of having to drive back to the hotel.*

I walked over and asked the hostess if I can grab a seat at the bar. I asked her if the USF game was on. She said "I'm sure it's on one of those TVs." Of course, it's not on any of the dozens of TVs at the inside bar or the outside bar. Not only that, but there were no seats available at either of the bars. I went back to the hostess defeated and asked for a table. They set me up in a booth that's facing three large screens. One was showing the Steelers-Titans pregame, one was showing the Celtics-Warriors game. The middle TV was on commercial. I did a 360 scan of the restaurant and the majority of TVs were turned to the Steelers game or curling (!?!). It's like FTT was running the place. Then the middle TV came out of the commercial break to show the Charleston Classic, some fake CBB tournament with two teams I couldn't locate on a map (Hofstra and somebody even more forgettable).

Anyhow, a waitress came over and before ordering a beer I asked if the middle TV could be turned to ESPN for the USF game. I showed her the game I'm streaming on my phone, thinking that would help. She told me that she'll have her manager change the game right away. I ordered a Goose Island IPA draft. She brought me the beer, but the TV hadn't changed to the USF game. She then brought me a cup of water and I asked if they were changing the TV. She said she told her manager and he was taking care of it. I ordered dinner: flat iron steak (medium rare), boom-boom shrimp with Caesar salad and rice & beans. She brought out my salad, still no USF game. I asked and she told me she would check. The Goose Island didn't taste quite right, so I switched it over to Sierra Nevada Pale Ale draft. She brought me that beer and my salad, still no USF game. I asked and she told me her manager was in the control room getting it changed at that very moment. Someone else brought me my meal. The shrimp and beans & rice were acceptable, the steak was a little rare, but still good. Finally, the USF game came on with about a minute left in the half and my waitress materialized, apologized for her manager not getting it on sooner and asked how my food was and if I wanted another beer.

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I did!


I didn't really pay attention to my game stream, but we apparently took the 2nd quarter off, trading field goals with Tulsa. So on the big screen I got to watch our D allow their backup QB to run another TD in with about 30 seconds left. 24-17 USF at the half. I could understand if the game was on CBS Sports Net or one of the millions of Fox Sports Net channels, but the game was on ESPN. It shouldn't have taken 20 minutes to find it. It's the WWL not the fucking Golf Channel!

Halftime.
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(hears the board-wide, "eh-hem") The waitress was an attractive woman in her early 20's. I don't think she was very good waitress, but had learned the rule of blaming everybody else for mistakes (managers, kitchen staff, bartenders) in an effort to maintain a good tip. Celebrity comparison: brunette, smaller breasted Jennifer Lawrence.

Both teams didn't do shit on offense in the second half and traded field goals. With less than a minute left we failed to convert on 3rd down and had to punt. The announcer said something like "all the Bulls have to do is get this punt off and ...." PUNT BLOCKED! Of course the special teams couldn't play a full game without a memorable fuck-up. Luckily the defense held and we escaped with a 27-20 win. I finished up the night with one Goose Island IPA and three Sierra Nevada Pale Ales. A USF win, four beers and a pretty good steak. I'll chalk that up as a win.

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So, looking forward to Black Friday. UCF and USF play for the AAC eastern division and a chance to play Memphis for the conference championship (at UCF if they win, at Memphis if USF wins). It seems like UCF has been steamrolling opponents so I took a look and compared the two teams.

UCF - PF: 482, PA: 205
USF - PF: 379, PA: 199

Over 11 games UCF has averaged a 44-19 win each game and USF has averaged a 34-18 win (including the loss to Houston).

Looking at common opponents (UConn, Nnati, ECU and Temple):

UCF - PF: 208, PA: 87
USF - PF: 174, PA: 61

Over those four games UCF has averaged a 52-22 win each game and USF has averaged a 44-15 win.

The second set of numbers makes it look a little closer (30 and 29 point margins of victory, respectively), but taking into account the Bulls' recent play I'm predicting a 34-24 UCF win. Oddsharks has UCF as a 9.5 point favorite.

I can practically see the Bulls running onto Tropicana Field to challenge the UAB Dragons Blazers in the Bad Boy Mowers Gasparilla Bowl on a climate-controlled, Thursday afternoon in December.

Go Bulls!

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* I know Uber is an option, but I had a rental car, so expensing an Uber ride while having a rental car just screams alcoholic.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby Briandong79 » 22 Nov 2017, 12:44

I got to halftime and lost the ability to read.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby CourtesyFlush » 22 Nov 2017, 12:56

Briandong79 wrote:I got to halftime and lost the ability to read.

Goose wrote:Halftime.
Image

Goodness gracious...
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby jman » 22 Nov 2017, 13:03

I really dislike Miller's Ale House. I think I've been there 3 times (twice in Chicago burbs and once in Orlando) and each time I've thought it should be a good place, then get there and get the food and realize you're basically at Applebees. Still, gotta do what you gotta do when traveling for work.

Also...

CourtesyFlush wrote:
Goose wrote:Halftime.
Image

Goodness gracious...
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby mj3528 » 22 Nov 2017, 13:08

jman wrote:I really dislike Miller's Ale House. I think I've been there 3 times (twice in Chicago burbs and once in Orlando) and each time I've thought it should be a good place, then get there and get the food and realize you're basically at Applebees. Still, gotta do what you gotta do when traveling for work.

Also...

CourtesyFlush wrote:
Goose wrote:Halftime.
Image

Goodness gracious...


I perused the beer list, and it looked a little pedestrian. Be better Miller Ale's House.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby Theny » 22 Nov 2017, 13:09

I enjoy the Millers Ale House restaurants. The one closest to my house was bought out and promptly run into the ground, grr.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby Frank the Tank » 26 Nov 2017, 10:25

My son was on the 8:30am flight from Hartford to Minneapolis today, as was UConn Football coach Randy Edsall. I wonder where he's headed to interview?
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby JichaelDick » 26 Nov 2017, 10:32

Frank the Tank wrote:My son was on the 8:30am flight from Hartford to Minneapolis today, as was UConn Football coach Randy Edsall. I wonder where he's headed to interview?


As luck would have it, Arizona State may have an opening.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby Frank the Tank » 26 Nov 2017, 12:44

JichaelDick wrote:
Frank the Tank wrote:My son was on the 8:30am flight from Hartford to Minneapolis today, as was UConn Football coach Randy Edsall. I wonder where he's headed to interview?


As luck would have it, Arizona State may have an opening.


He reports he was not on his flight from Minneapolis to Phoenix. And he reports being very relieved by that.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby Goose » 27 Nov 2017, 09:34

Charlie Strong got fired by Texas and was gifted this:

An 11-2 team
A team favored to go 12-0 in 2017 and playing no tough out of conference games and getting the dregs of the AAC West
A QB who was the AAC Offensive Player of the Year, who rushed for 1,530 yards, the 4th-highest total ever by a FBS quarterback, and 18 touchdowns
A QB who also threw for 2,812 passing yards with a 62.5 completion percentage, 24 touchdowns, and 7 interceptions
An offense that scored a program-record 77 TDs and averaged 43.8 point per game
A junior placekicker (Emilio Nadelman) who made all seven of his field goal attempts
A senior punter (Jonathan Hernandez) with a 41.2-yard average, 25 punts downed inside the 20-yard line and 13 that surpassed 50 yards.
They lost their best RB (Marlon Mack) who rushed for over 1,000 yards but had an ample replacement in D’Ernest Johnson, who rushed for 543 yards and had 28 receptions while being the team’s best return man (led the league with a 11.8-yard average on punt returns) and scoring 14 total touchdowns

Granted, they had a defense that surrendered 31.6 points per game last year. But Strong was supposed to be a defensive mastermind and they did improve by about nine points per game. Of course it was against much weaker opponents than last season (no FSU, Navy or Memphis on the schedule). We got the Wisconsin type draw of the AAC West this year.

So what is there to say about this team that Strong took over where the defense improved but still couldn't stop teams when it mattered, an offense that regressed by about one TD per game and special teams play that were comical at best and crippling at worst?

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Charlie gets the Sandman, Chandler and Kramer versions. Bob's not even going to dignify this performance.

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Maybe Tennessee will hire Strong and we can get Kevin Sumlin in here.

USF lost 49-42 against UCF on Black Friday. The defense and special teams looked lost the whole game and the offense only looked good when Quinton Flowers said fuck it and ran sand lot plays. Flowers passed for 500 yards, 4 TDs, 1 INT and ran for 105 yards and 1 TD. USF took a 6 point lead at the end of the 3rd quarter before the D allowed two straight TD drives that put us down by 8 with about 2-1/2 minutes left. Flowers threw an 83 yard TD pass and we converted a 2 pointer to tie the game with a throw back (3 receivers on the right side, Flowers rolled right, Johnson chipped the left end and wiggled out to the left corner) from Flowers to Johnson. But then our kickoff team gave up a 95 yard return to lose the game 49-42.


Anyhow, a disappointing end to the season leads to a disappointing end to this post.




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Okay, that's mean. I can't do this to you guys. Here's the cheesecake.

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Okay, maybe I can. I'm still a little upset.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby SouthernYokel » 27 Nov 2017, 11:31

on the other hand, that was the best football game i watched all year. i'm sure that's a great deal of consolation to you.
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Re: Who needs Power 5 when you're a power bottom: AAC Footba

Postby The Long Dick of the Law » 27 Nov 2017, 11:33

SouthernYokel wrote:on the other hand, that was the best football game i watched all year. i'm sure that's a great deal of consolation to you.

more consolation than the lack of titties is for the rest of the bored.... yet another guy gets in the HoS and loses his fastball
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